Friday 4 March 2016

KCSE 2015 TOP SECONDARY SCHOOLS

Ranking was banned by the ministry. This here is courtesy of The Daily Nation.
Kabarak High School – 11.667.
Maseno School – 11.393.
Alliance High School – 11.37.
Utumishi Academy – 11.1704,
Kapsabet Boys – 11.15,
St Joseph’ Boys in Trans Nzoia County – 11.0,
Sacho High School – 10.973,
Light Academy, Nairobi – 10.93,
Rang’ala Girls High School – 10.9 and
Kapsabet Girls High School – 10.89.
Light Academy, Mombasa – 10.86,
Asumbi Girls High School – 10.833,
Kanga High School – 10.8,
Rumuruti Mother of Grace Boys secondary – 10.78,
Murang’a High – 10.74,
Pioneer School – 10.74,
St Patricks’ Iten – 10.7,
Maranda – 10.6,
Chogoria Girls High School – 10.569
Kagumo High School – 10.54,
Sheikh Khalifa Bin Zayed 10.53
Lenana School – 10.5                                                                                                    
Litein Boys High School – 10.37.
Strathmore School – 10.35,
Friends School Kamusinga – 10.28,
Kapenguria Boys – 10.217,
St Mary Boys – 10.08,
Moi Girls – 10.04
Booker Academy – 10.4,
Sing’ore Girls – 10.4,
Abu Hureira Academy – 10.02,
Kipsigis Girls – 10.1,
Samoei High School – 10.01,
Kisii School – 10.0

Friday 15 May 2015

... WORD OF THE DAY JOKES!!

Cause they are trending like crazy!!


Kikuyu word of the day Uterus.:”We know arsenal are the FA champions 2014 is not a must uterus!”
Kikuyu word of the day: roar – “The government should roar the price of basic commodities”
Kikuyu word of the day MOROCCO-eg ” its the hope of many kenyan artists that Djs and radio stations play morocco music.
Kikuyu word of the day: Tissue. Example: Kimani, you are doing it wrong, lemme Tissue how to dougie
Kikuyu word of the day MAINA: The casualties suffered MAINA injuries
Kikuyu word of the day MACHARIA eg.. The guests arrived MACHARIA than expected!
Kikuyu word of the Day AARON…Kamau was broke so he asked for aaron from Barclays Bank.”
Kikuyu word of the day ARROW..Njoroge’s phone rang,he picked it up and said arrow
Kikuyu word of the day: Mushroom. Example: I need to buy another sofa. There is too mushroom in my house.
Kikuyu word NDERITU…In a sentence: “John’s car stalled in traffic because of NDERITU fuel he put.
kikuyu word of the day wheelbarrow – we have no tea leaves left, wheelbarrow some from our neighbour
Kikuyu word of the day….”CHICKEN WING” Example in a sentence: “Njeri plays the Lottery everyday so CHICKEN WING some money”
Kikuyu word of the day:4.ROUGHENED – My sweetheart gives me ROUGHENED affection
kikuyu word of the day: WHEEL CHAIR .example,If you dont have money 4 food dont worry,Wheel Chair mine (sourced :http://nairobiwire.com/2014/05/hilarious-kikuyu-words-day.html)
 Luhya word of the day: Menopause Example: Chunga maisha pwana utang'olewa meno pause."
Kalenjin word of the day MAGAZINE: Huyo ni mtoto wa pratha ya papa yangu , sisi ni MAGAZINE. 
Luo word of the day '"Cyber" When Rose came back home alipata kama mwizi "acyber" kila kitu

Kikuyu word of the day: Cuddle. Leo hakuna stima itabidi muwashe cuddle
Kikuyu word of the day: EYEBROW. E.g. Please wait, before you go EYEBROW you a kiss.
Kikuyu word of the day SOLANGE. I wonder how JayZ kisses Beyonce coz his lips are SOLANGE.
Kikuyu word : IRIGU It is IRIGU to drive a car with tinted windows
Kikuyu word of the day “rav 4″ My rav 4 u is real
Kikuyu word of the day ‘kikuyu’. If you dont leave my house sai sai i have strong legs i will kikuyu out
Kikuyu word of the night is COBRA Usage: Nimepereka viatu kwa Cobra zishoneshwe.”
Kikuyu word for the day lumia Njoroge ako lum ya ciku wamelala
Kikuyu-American word of the day: ANGOLA In a sentence: ANGOLAgo now or I’ll be late
Kikuyu word of the day, PRIEST. “Are you the new pastor? I’m priest to meet you.”
Kikuyu word of the day; WANGARI: Huyu ni dereva WANGARI gani?
Kikuyu word of the day: LADY. ‘Yes sir, I am LADY to do my presentation..'”
Kikuyu word of the day..Horror…”When you get to town, just horror and i will come to pick you up”
Kikuyu word of the day SHAKE UP’Kamau is not feeling well,he needs to go for a shake up’
Kikuyu word of the day “LOL” The ball is LOLing on the ground
Kikuyu word of the day: CHINA : Viatu zangu ni chafu, nitapitia kwa choe CHINA
Kikuyu word of the day: Nerea: Nilionerea nitoe mimba yako
Kikuyu word of the day: Kupata matatu iko na wifi, nerea sana

Kamba words
Kamba word of the day is WIRE. Eg : WIRE ujinga bana! LOOL
Kamba word of the day “PAINT” Used in na sentence “Mutiso quick, call an ambulance, muli amePAINT”
Kamba word of the day: Ending. Example: Its gotten late. I should be ending to class now.
Kamba word of the day HONDA. At a hotel “Mutuku just get the menu and Honda for everything”
Kamba word of the day: L Example: All sinners will go to L.
Kamba word of the day HYUNDAI.. if a car hits u, Hyundai!!!””
Kamba word for the day is “Tumaini” and example in a sentence is “Tumaini twa ng’ombe ni tamu kuliko twa Mbuzi”
Kamba word of the day: BEYONCE Example in a sentence: Ndon’t copy me. Njust Beyoncelf.

Kalenjin word of the day: AGA : Eh! Si vera ako na AGA !
 

Monday 3 March 2014

FREE INTERNET DOWNLOAD MANAGER 6.18.12 WITH PATCH!!

100% working IDM version 6.18.12 cracked with patch!!
Download from link below: Wait 5s then click ad. Click Regular download. Wait 30s. Enter the Captcha displayed in solvemedia and click continue. Click regular download by browser. Now the download can begin. Please be patient. In case of problems inform me.
http://adf.ly/eLCJu

Saturday 15 February 2014

KCSE 2010 RESULTS NAIROBI COUNTY/PROVINCE (ALL SCHOOLS AND STUDENTS)

For a complete list of KCSE 2010 results for all schools and students in Nairobi County/Province , download the PDF below. Click any of the links. In case of any issues comment below.

http://adf.ly/1WeDEb                                        
http://adf.ly/1WeDRq

Wednesday 12 February 2014

How to remove virus turning files and folders into shortcuts. 100% working.

I'll go straight to the point.
1. Download the files below. You'll need them. Wait for 5s then click SKIP AD.

i. Smadav antivirus    link:   http://adf.ly/dT2hr
ii. Everything.exe       link:   http://adf.ly/dT2QD

2. Install both softwares.
3. Using Smadav scan your computer (harddisk ,registry etc) ,flashdisk/memory.
4. DON'T click fix all yet. That won't get rid of the virus. Trust me.
5.Open taskmanager (Right click taskbar)
6. Click processes tab. Look for wscript.exe.
7. Right click it. End process
8.Click Start . Search for msconfig
9.Look for wscript (under command) . Untick it. Click OK.
10. Now you can go back to smadav. Click virus tab.
11. Look for a path starting with C:\ or D:\   or whichever letter your hard disk is. Look at the whole file path is you will see the name of a file ending with .vbs. Copy or memorise that name.
12. Open Everything.exe and paste the name of the file.
13. Is should have an S kind of icon and there should several of them. It should end .vbs.
14. Click to select. Press and hold Shift then press delete to delete them completely. Delete all of them!!
15. Now you can go back to smadav and click fix all.
16. If it shows error . Don't worry. Thats because there is no longer any virus to delete.

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!! If you got any queries please do comment below or you can email me mainakinuthia@gmail.com .. and if I have been of much much help, you can help me raise some cash for a laptop below. Thank you guys!!



Wednesday 29 January 2014

Matatu Sticker jokes / quotes.

 

 Well Kenyan matatu's are known for their rather rude but wise sticker quotes/jokes. Here are some of them, feel free to add more:


  1. Usilete stress kwa gari.
  2. Usifungue madirisha, ungetaka upepo ungebebwa na bodaboda.
  3. Kama una haraka ungesafiri jana.
  4. Hakuna stage ya kumi,kula ndizi kisha ganda kalia uteleze mpaka tao
  5. Kama una haraka sana shuka ukimbie
  6. Songea mwenzako starehe ni kwa wheelchair
  7. Wauliza konda, iko kiti? Kwani wengine wamekalia ndoo
  8. Kulipa ni lazima Change ni ukikumbuka
  9. Dere ana bibi,konda anatafuta
  10. Kulipa fare kwa mwanaume ni kawaida lakini msupa tunaeza ongea
  11. Marehemu alituacha kwa kukosa kufunga mshipi kama wewe
  12. Unajifanya mkali kwa gari na kwako wewe ni bubu
  13. Ungesikiza mwalimu ukiwa shule saizi ungekua na gari yako
  14. Derefa ni yesu makanga ni saitani
  15. Hatusemi wewe ni mnono lakini ukikalia viti mbili ..
  16. Kushuta ni sare, kutapika soo
  17. Kupanda ni popote kushuka ni stage
  18. Kama inzi angeacha ujinga,angetengeneza asali 
  19. Ati mwisho wa gari ni hapo, Kwani ikipita hapo inakuwa ndege
  20. Ukiona fare iko juu ndiyo mwanzo wa msoto shuka ukimbize barabara
  21. Salimia huyo ako kando, kukatiana ni mkishuka!
  22. Msongee kidogo dere anashuka pale mbele uketi
  23. Hata ukipimwa sitaki!
  24. If you miss the driver, kiss the conductor
  25. Heri kununua MATATU kuliko kuoa BIBI Mkorofi!
  26. Ati hakuna kiti? Kwani hawa wako hapa wamekalia mikembe ya rangi
  27. Hata maji chafu huzima moto
  28. Kama gari iko na joto ,shuka upande fridge
  29. Nyamba ukitoka
  30. Kama hujanunua hapa usikulie hapa
  31. Ukichengwa tulia!
  32.  KARAO ALIPE GARI
  33. mbuzi kala mkeka,wadaku mtaketi wapi?
  34. Dere ni waya,konda ni faya..we huwesmek!
  35. Hakuna stage ya hapo dere. 
  36. Hata ukipimwa hakuna dawa
  37. Starehe ya gari ni kupanda nyuma.
  38. Dere ako sawa, konda fitty kabisa mbona wewe ni sumbua?
  39. Mapenzi kwa gari ni wanne wanne ka orbit!
  40. Unaringa na haujapimwa
  41. Dere ni moto, Konda ni wazimu, usituletee stress kwa hii gari!
  42. If the music is too loud then you are too old
  43. Unajifanya ngombe ukamuliwe na nani?
  44. Mzee ni wewe!
  45. Ukitaka kuketi starehe,nunua gari yako! 
  46. Unajifanya asali ulambwe na nani?
  47. Si ati ni gari haina mbio ,jam ndiyo kubwa
  48. Makosa ya marehemu ni kuwa hakutumia juala.
  49. Kama utamu waua,sumu ya nini?
  50. Usiharakishe dere...wee ndio umechelewa
  51. Mdomo mkubwa chapati waikunjia nini?
  52. More seat upstairs
  53. Usitoe viatu kwa gari!
  54. No calls please sms only
  55. Juzi sare,,
    Jana sare,,
    Acha aibu.!
    Lipa leo!

Thursday 17 October 2013

University of Nairobi Chemichemi Wi-Fi network not connecting ?

Frustrating, isn't it? You followed all the steps in http://wiki.uonbi.ac.ke/doku.php. You downloaded that software that keeps saying chemichemi Failed ......retrying. You try to connect and you see a red X next to Chemichemi. You click and a message appears "The settings on this computer for the network do not match the requirements for the network".  Well don't start crying. It will only take you a couple of seconds to solve. Under Wireless Network Connection > Right click on Chemichemi > Click Properties > Under Encryption type change from TKIP to AES. Voila! C'est tout! Problem solved. If it works ,or not, or if you have questions, please do comment below. Hopefully those ICT guys will solve this issue soon.